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Ming Tian Wo Yao Jia Gei Ni La (Tmrw I will be marrying you) While cleaning my old stuff, I found this old (and new) story: Women, Marriage, Life and Understanding -- Inspired by a woman’s suicidal attempt On the night of this Tuesday, I was very close to an attempting suicide scene. A woman, who worked in a garment factory near Red Market, sat herself on the fence of the 13th floor terrace. According to the description by some witnesses, she sat there, facing the busy street, her feet and arms flipping out, as if she cared nothing. After almost two hours standoff with the police and firemen, this poor woman came down from the fence. It was said that despite all the talks with the negotiators, her emotional tension released only after her friend arrived and comforted her. And it was an apology from a workmate who wronged her as a thief made her giving up suicide. That late night while I walked in the nearby streets with a crescent moon hanging up, wondering what life are, people still talked about this incident. One guy even stopped a bus and reported, ‘Oh, the girl finally came down…” During the negotiating time, the adjacent roads were closed up and traffic was greatly affected. Some even cursed, ‘Jump, jump immediately, don’t block my way…’ You could see there are 100 opinions, kind and vicious. The next day’s Ou Mun Pou (Macao Daily News) showed a terrifying picture of this scenario. It mentioned the cause for her suicide attempt was small quarreling and misunderstanding with another dorm-mate. However, the main reason behind, according to insiders, is the psychological stress the woman -- a migrant worker from China ‒ has long suffered from the failure of marriage. Before she was a fast working woman, but after her husband divorced her and then took the from her, she almost collapsed. What’s worse, she turned to gamble. The wronging incident was but something igniting the volcano. Now the woman has been sent back to her home in China (I doubted if she had one). This case is a piece on the iceberg. It reflects how marriage would ruin a woman, if she does not / cannot position it well. In a Chinese society, marriage still means a lot to women. Those who haven’t married want to get married, those who have simply want to maintain it, no matter how bad its status is. Though things are under change, it is still a mainstream thinking that women should all be married and get a family, happy or not. But I would like to tell our female folks, live well your life first, put your own happiness as priority. You should not rely 100% on men, marriage or family. Don’t be dependent. You need to have these basic but essential understandings. You need to balance among these factors, and balance your emotion once you fail your marriage or the marriage fails you, or anything else. Remember, marry to merry, but not marry to marry. To all our weak and strong women. By Wallow in Salt, 2007 |
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1/16/2008 2:27 am |
I think the Chinese American women are getting stronger then their sisters in China. Vicky
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Vic, Sisters in china are also getting stronger in general. Most divorces are proposed by women if they deem it unpleasant and want a new kufe, This was a particular story. HD, Be neutre-to-optimistic twds life's thorn.
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DVC&Oasis, Right, inter-depedent.
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