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An Elder, a Treasure When my friend Esther told me there's repulsive rejection to building a rest home for the senior citizens in a Macau community, I felt it unbelievable and my feeling was hurt. "Are they poisons? Is a rest home a nuclear plant?" I gushed to my friend, as if she was one of the rejecters. She then pushed me to develop this topic. So comes it. Firstly, let me ask you, how would you spend your retired time? would you prefer to live with family or idle away in a rest home? The answer may be varied, depending on your cultural background, or economic background. Many ppl, esp. Chinese ppl tried to convince others that spending life in rest homes is not as miserable as imagined. They say, come on, get rid of the outdated thinking way and keep up with time, embrace the old age years in a rest home. It's a popular concept in the West, when you get old and the younger generation has no time for you, it's nice to hang out with other elders in the well-equipped rest home. You would get good service and treatment (if you are able to pay). Much better than give burden to your or staying alone at home. You would feel healthy and happy there! Is it true? I have no doubt that the luxury rest centers would treat you well, wishing you a long life so as to contribute to them lifelong, though I ever watched some American soup opera series that they would kill the ailing old guys in some rest homes for the sake of profit. But will you be able to lead a healthy and happy life in an elder's nursery? Think it twice or thrice before you send your parents or grandparents, as well as yourself to the rest homes. Let's have a look and feel into the rest homes' environment, not the hardwares, but the softwares. Can you imagine an old person being alone in a room everyday, or, a group of old persons being alone in an isolated venue everyday, counting the days left? It's indeed a silver-haired community coz all they see is silver hair, clumpsy acts and gloomy mood of being old. There's no ' shouting, young ppl's laughters, the communication with is extremely limited - they only find time to visit once in a while; if they are far from the rest home, the visit is once and never a while (an audience member phoned in a radio program saying if the rest home is built in a further place like Hengqin - 30min away, they wont visit often as it's too troublesome). No interaction with the society at all, except that once in a while a school visiting or a charity function presenting some spoony shows. For elders ending up in rest homes, the real situation is : growing old and dying fast together without true love and life! We well understand, human needs stimulus to be healthy. For men, as they said, it's big breast; for , it may be toys or games; for elders, it's the interaction with young people. (That's why Maddona looks so young and energetic, boz her bfs are ever younger and younger...) 'Imprisoning' old people in rest homes is inhumane and bad for them overall. On the other hand, without seniors around, and the young also suffer losses as they cant learn from them their precious experience. As a proverb says, an elder at home is like a treasure in hand. All said, I object to irresponsibly putting seniors into rest homes. I suggest that elders be treated like ppl of normal age, live together (if possible) with young generation, or, at least, stay as often as possible with the young for positive interactions. Young guys and gals, you shouldn't mind living with your parents and all those trifles. Believe me and trust your dad and mom, they are indeed your treasures and great advisers in everything. So if they advise you not to marry that guy, dont do it otherwise you'd regret it. It's also our long history virtue to respect our seniors, which distinguishes our culture from Western culture. In China, it's one's legal duty to feed and support parents in old age. I heard quite a lot stories that in today's $-driven Chinese society, many , in many cases a corrupted by a -in-law, just rip off their parents and let them become homeless and foodless. So sad, remember: The three wants to rest but the wind keeps blowing; The wants to fulfill his duty but the parents are not there. Love your elder and treasure them in proper way! |
