For a cookie
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Posted:May 14, 2007 2:05 pm
Last Updated:Sep 30, 2007 12:40 am 18824 Views
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Because I was asked 4 an update, I've sold my house in the country and moved back to the town I was born in on the south coast here in England.
My youngest and I love to go kayaking on the two rivers and on the harbour. I can now go cycling in the New Forest and along the rivers but I do miss all the cycleways back where I used to live. I'm off to Spain in a couple of weeks for a break.
I'm living in my Mum's house (as it was empty) and am bringing it back to life. Houses don't do so well if left empty for too long. I am now close to other family members and feel as though I've 're-joined' a family I'd lost touch with.
I've started playing my bass guitar again but as yet, just get frustrated as my 'mind' knows all the notes and riffs I used to play but my rusty old fingers semm to play a different tune!
Life is quite calm and easy at the moment.
'Something' is still missing, but that can wait.
TG
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Thoughts for fun
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Posted:May 3, 2007 1:51 pm
Last Updated:May 18, 2007 2:55 pm 19417 Views
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Save The Whales. Collect The Whole Set.
A Day Without Sunshine is Like, Night.
42.7% Of All Statistics Are Made Up On The Spot.
Light Travels Faster Than Sound, Which Is Why Some People Appear Bright Until You Hear Them Speak. (Lve that one)
I Feel Like I'm Diagonally Parked In A Parallel Universe.
Honk If You Love Peace And Quiet.
Remember, Half The People You Know Are Below Average.
He Who Laughs Last, Thinks Slowest.
Depression Is Merely Anger Without Enthusiasm.
The Early Bird May Get The Worm, But The Second Mouse Gets The Cheese.
I Drive Way Too Fast To Worry About Cholesterol.
Support Bacteria. They're The Only Culture Some People Have.
Monday Is An Awful Way To Spend 1/7 Of Your Week.
A Clear Conscience Is Usually The Sign Of A Bad Memory.
Change Is Inevitable, Except From Vending Machines.
Get A New Car For Your Spouse. It'll Be A Great Trade!
Plan To Be Spontaneous Tomorrow.
Always Try To Be Modest, And Be Proud Of It!
If You Think Nobody Cares, Try Missing A Couple Of Payments.
How Many Of You Believe In Psycho-Kinesis? Raise My Hand.
Ok,.... So What's The Speed Of Dark?
How Do You Tell When You're Out Of Invisible Ink?
If Everything Seems To Be Going Well, You Have Obviously Overlooked Something.
When Everything Is Coming Your Way, You're In The Wrong Lane.
Hard Work May Pay Off In The Future. Laziness Pays Off Now.
Everyone Has A Photographic Memory. Some Just Do Not Have Film.
If Barbie Is So Popular, Why Do You Have To Buy Her Friends?
How Much Deeper Would The Ocean Be Without Sponges?
Eagles May Soar, But Weasels Do Not Get sucked Into Jet Engines.
What Happens If You Get Scared Half To Death Twice?
I Used To Have An Open Mind But My Brains Kept Falling Out.
I Couldn't Repair Your Brakes, So I Made Your Horn Louder.
Why Do Psychics Have To Ask You For Your Name?
Inside Every Older Person Is A Younger Person Wondering What Happened?
Enjoy - lighter moments are good for you!
TG
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Cheeky
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Posted:Sep 12, 2006 10:55 pm
Last Updated:Jul 24, 2007 11:37 am 19539 Views
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I have a mischieveous side to me - oh you noticed?
This was sent to me by a frined and sounds just like the sort of thing I may do when I'm very old and retired?
From an 'old person's story book of life' :
Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting.
Well for example, the other day I went into town and went into a shop. I was only in there for about 5 minutes, when I came out there was a cop writing out a parking ticket.
I went up to him and said, "Come on man, how about giving a senior citizen a break?"
He ignored me and continued writing the ticket.
I called him a Nazi. He glared at me and started writing another ticket for having worn tires.
So I called him a Bast**d. He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he started writing a third ticket.
This went on for about 20 minutes.
The more I abused him, the more tickets he wrote.
Personally, I didn't care. I came into town by bus!
I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important at my age.
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Why carry on?
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Posted:Sep 8, 2006 10:41 pm
Last Updated:Jan 3, 2007 1:15 pm 19068 Views
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If you are in Chinese FriendFinder looking for your 1st love or just for friends, then this post is NOT for you.
Given that most that are looking for partners in aff, it means that other relationships have failed. Some may have had many relashionships. The deeper the love, the more pain you get when it ends and to some, that pain is almost beyond living. Given that in the real world in the marriage arena, many fail. Yet we carry on looking for yet another relashionship in an on-line dating site - which has an even higher failure rate.
The 'word' that probably comes to most of us is 'HOPE' and yet, based on the facts and the evidence and the history, what is hope? Is it the blind ability to ignore everything that has happened so that when it happens again, it's 'unexpected' and we can say "I didn't see that coming" But 'hope' doesn't fit into a mind like mine that seems to have been cursed with an overdose of logic. So I have to ask, why do we carry on?
TG (strange/funny mood today)
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I shouldn't - but I must
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Posted:Sep 5, 2006 5:06 pm
Last Updated:Dec 3, 2006 12:49 pm 18747 Views
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One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me,
"What setting do I use on the washing machine?"
"It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?"
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma."
And they say blondes are dumb...
A couple are lying in bed. The man says, "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world." The woman replies, "I'll miss you.."
"It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if
I mowed the lawn like this?"
"Probably that I married you for your money," she replied.
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight? She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart.
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?
A: A rumor
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good fairy came to them
and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband. Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.
The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger...
Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! Gotta love that fairy!
A PRAYER....
Dear Lord,
I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods.
Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.
AMEN
Q: Why do little boys whine?
A: They are practicing to be men.
Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?
A: Trustworthy.
Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.
Q: Why do female black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
A: To stop the snoring before it starts.
Q: Why do men whistle when they are sitting on the toilet?
A: It helps them remember which end they need to wipe.
Q: What is the difference between men and women?
A: A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder "Instruction Manuals"
Sorry guys, but sometimes we deserve it!
TG
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Never underestimate the obvious
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Posted:Sep 5, 2006 4:59 pm
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2006 11:11 pm 18499 Views
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Subject: Need A Push
A man and his wife were awakened at 3 o'clock in the morning by a loud pounding on the door. The man got up and went to the door where a drunken
stranger, standing in the pouring rain, asked him for a push.
"Not a chance," said the husband, "It is three o'clock in the morning."
He slammed the door and returned to bed.
"Who was that?" asked his wife!
"Just some drunk guy asking for a push," he answered.
"Did you help him?" she asked.
"Are you kidding? NO, I did not. It is three o'clock in the morning and it's pouring rain outside!!"
His wife said: "Can't you remember about three months ago when we broke down and those two guys helped us? I think you should help him and you should be ashamed of yourself!"
The man did as he was told (of course!), got dressed and went out into the pouring rain.
He called out into the dark: "Hello! Are you still there?"
"Yes," came back the answer.
"Do you still need a push?" called out the husband.
"Yes! Please!" came the reply from the darkness.
"Where are you?" asked the husband.
"Over here on the swing!!" replied the drunk.
Think outside the box!
TG
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New beginning ?
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Posted:Sep 5, 2006 4:22 pm
Last Updated:Oct 1, 2006 5:22 am 18805 Views
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The house is on the market with loads of interest so should be sold soon. Then I will move down to the coast where I was born and be back with my family and lady-friend close by. The end of twenty years in the peace and quiet of the country-side, but the beginning of a more social life rather than the solitude.
Mixed feelings, but a challenge.
TG
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Computers - love/hate ?
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Posted:Sep 4, 2006 1:02 pm
Last Updated:Sep 6, 2006 11:10 pm 18796 Views
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For all of us who feel only the deepest
love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives, read on.
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following
characteristics (and I just love this part):
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would
crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in
the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the
freeway for no reason. You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the
windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such
as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was
powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water temperature, and
alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal
Operation" warning light.
7. The airbag system would ask "Are you
sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever,
your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of
the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car
buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the "Start" button
to turn the engine off.
Computers - don't we just love 'em.
(This was sent to me by a friend)
TG
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Selfish little people
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Posted:Aug 28, 2006 11:56 am
Last Updated:Sep 1, 2006 12:25 pm 19271 Views
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Again and again, the newbies post multiple posts often as many as 15. This is selfish (if I wish to be polite) but also ignorant, dum, and 'kin RUDE. The simplest obseravtion of what a blogs page looks like would inform even a that most bloggers write one or maybe a couple of posts at a time - NOT dozens! Just how dim are some people?
Now, unfortunately, to get this across to the latest dim-wits 'sihai' and 'skyangleapple' I would need to spend some time with a translater.
I have better things to do but maybe someone who has more patience than me could get this point across.
How can people be so dum?
TG
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Good day, bad day
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Posted:Jul 15, 2006 4:05 pm
Last Updated:Sep 5, 2006 4:15 pm 19429 Views
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Each day comes and goes - to still be around at the end of the day sometimes, makes one feel humble. Yet another accident on the road today - a lorry turned over and was sliding towards me but another car was hit first and a youg girl was slightly hurt. Why do people just stop and look but just get in the way - either help or bugger off! We helped the young girl out of her smashed up car and she couldn't stand or walk so we assumed she was hurt but it was just 'shock' and she soon recovered. What a mess. I was decorating the last big room (the master bedroon) and caught my foot on the steps and sent the tub of emulsion flying all over the carpet. That is now ruined and will have to be replaced. Stopped work, cooked a meal and watched Batman Begins on sky. Now messing on the PC - need sleep - beddy-byes time. This was a bad day. Hopefully tomorrow will be a good day.
Life goes on for those lucky enough to have a reasonable life to lead.
TG
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