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at the Wedding 12/31/2007 At a friend's wedding, everything went smoothly until it was time for the flower girl and her young escort to come down the aisle. The boy stopped at every pew, growling at the guests 1 Comments, 37 Views, 0 Votes | |
Problems from the start 12/31/2007 John got off the elevator on the 50th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date's door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said. "I'll be ready in a few minut 1 Comments, 30 Views, 0 Votes | |
Common wedding questions and answers 12/31/2007 Q: Is it all right to bring a date to the wedding? A: Not if you are the groom. Q: How many showers is the bride supposed to have? A: At least one within a week of the wedding. 1 Comments, 23 Views, 0 Votes | |
Reception: 12/31/2007 Remember to reserve the UAW hall far in advance, and avoid Saturdays, since that's bingo night. It is perfectly acceptable to ask guests to wipe their feet before entering the hall. After all 1 Comments, 9 Views, 0 Votes | |
The ceremony: 12/31/2007 No matter how urgent the event, loaded weapons have no place at the alter. At the point in the ceremony that says, "If anybody has any reason why these two should no be joined in holy matrimony..." te 1 Comments, 7 Views, 0 Votes | |
men fear marriage 12/31/2007 An organization that makes men fear marriage The British had an organization that Americans are now considering adopting. It seems that in England, they had a men's club, Bachelors' A 1 Comments, 16 Views, 0 Votes | |
Don't take any chances 12/31/2007 A person receives a telegram informing him about his mother-in-law's death. It also enquires whether she should be buried or burnt. He replies, "Don't take chances. Burn the body and 1 Comments, 14 Views, 0 Votes | |
The tradition at weddings 12/31/2007 A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?" His mom replies, "The bride is in white because she's happy and this is the happiest day o 1 Comments, 22 Views, 0 Votes | |
Getting revenge with marriage 12/31/2007 Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he sad to his wife: "When I'm dead I want you to marry farmer Jones." Wife: "No, I can't marry a 1 Comments, 20 Views, 0 Votes | |
Going crazy with confusion 12/31/2007 A psychiatrist visited a California mental institution and asked a patient, "How did you get here? What was the nature of your illness?" He got the following reply. "Well, it all started when 1 Comments, 47 Views, 0 Votes | |
A very desperate marriage 12/31/2007 A man really loved a woman, but he was just too shy to propose to her. Now he was up in his years and neither of them had ever been married. Of course, they dated about once a week for the past six ye 1 Comments, 59 Views, 0 Votes | |
Married life 12/31/2007 Married life is full of excitement and frustration: * In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. * In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. * In the third ye 1 Comments, 41 Views, 0 Votes | |
Marriage is not a word. 12/31/2007 Marriage is not a word. It is a sentence--a life sentence. Marriage is very much like a violin; after the sweet music is over, the strings are attached. Marriage is love. Love is bli 1 Comments, 31 Views, 0 Votes | |
To my confidant 12/25/2007 You reached out when I had nothing left inside. I felt despair and you really did care, you also did share and didn't compare. Confidants like you are hard to find, my heart was throw 1 Comments, 137 Views, 0 Votes | |
The Chinese restaurant owner 10/25/2007 A single Chinese man owns a Chinese restaurant, and one day a beautiful Chinese woman walks in. He immediately walks over and asks her out on a date. She agrees. They go out for a while, and s 1 Comments, 92 Views, 0 Votes | |
This phenomenon called life 9/22/2007 Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story. -Max Ehrmann We have been invi 1 Comments, 56 Views, 0 Votes | |
A guy was trying to console a friend 9/17/2007 A guy was trying to console a friend who'd just found his wife in bed with another man. "Get over it, buddy, " he said. "It's not the end of the world." "It's all right for you to say 1 Comments, 66 Views, 0 Votes | |
Messy desk 9/17/2007 Messy desk. Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like you're not working hard enough. Build huge piles of documents around your workspace. To the observe 1 Comments, 20 Views, 0 Votes | |
Warning Labels 9/17/2007 If government is going to put health warning labels on beer, wine and liquor, let's at least have a little truthfulness about the matter! WARNING: Consumption of alcohol ma 1 Comments, 49 Views, 0 Votes | |
What is the difference? 9/17/2007 What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb? You can unscrew a light bulb!... 1 Comments, 29 Views, 0 Votes | |
Learn What They Live 9/17/2007 If live with criticism, they learn to condemn. If live with hostility, they learn to fight. If live with fear, they learn to be apprehensive. If live with pity, 1 Comments, 17 Views, 0 Votes | |
Confession 9/10/2007 A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9-year old comes home unexpectedly, sees them, and hides in the bedroom cupboard to watch. The woman's husband also comes h 1 Comments, 92 Views, 0 Votes | |
Animal Miracles 9/10/2007 A protects his elderly owner from a hungry alligator; a defends a from a wild animal attack; a pet detective searches for a cat; a woman finds new purpose in life thanks to a skunk; and a re 1 Comments, 19 Views, 0 Votes | |
GRIZZ TRACKS 9/10/2007 When Canadian RCMP Handler Gord Burns and his Griz were called in to track a family lost in the mountains in the dead of winter, Griz's instincts went beyond his training. Through excellent se 1 Comments, 12 Views, 0 Votes | |
Clinging to pain only punishes ourselves 9/10/2007 Painful situations, relationships hurt us, memories of experiences that pinch our nerve endings, need not imprison us. However, we are seldom very quick to let go of the pain. Instead, we bec 1 Comments, 81 Views, 0 Votes | |
WIFE 9/3/2007 Dearest Wife: We would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen. -Mark Twain... 1 Comments, 61 Views, 0 Votes | |
The Burned Ears 8/21/2007 A guy burned two ears... so they were asking him at the hospital how it happened. He said, ''I was ironing my clothing and the phone rang... So, instead of the phone I picked up the iron and 1 Comments, 84 Views, 0 Votes | |
Perfumed Blonde 8/21/2007 Why does a blonde put perfume on her ankles? Because it ends up behind her ears anyway!... 1 Comments, 61 Views, 0 Votes | |
How to restore trust 8/13/2007 Once trust has been violated is very difficult to repair. There are many forms of betrayal and a common theme of betrayal is infidelity these days. There is a common belief amongst women that ONLY men 1 Comments, 178 Views, 0 Votes | |
She's So Blonde 7/14/2007 She's so blonde she spent an hour looking at a can of orange juice because it said "concentrate". 1 Comments, 96 Views, 0 Votes |
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