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My got "engagement ring" today My texted me last night from Detroit she is coming back home on Saturday morning and will leave on Sunday (1 night/2 days only). She wants to have lunch with me and her brother (my ) together. My came home around noon time and showed me her engagement ring. Her high school sweetheart since 2004 proposed her and put the ring on her ring finger. I said "Congratulations" to them. Her boyfriend (now fiance) currently works at a hospital emergency room as a technician for 2 years. Her boyfriend's father is a pastor (minister) of a Chinese Christian Church in Irvine, CA. My actually got admitted to UC Berkeley in 2005 but she went to UC Irvine to be with her boyfriend. Her boyfriend only got B.S. degree in Psychology in 4 years, my got Psychology and Neurobiology dual degrees as "Summa Cum Laude" honor in 5 years. She is attending a post-graduate medical school in Detroit for 2 years, still have 2 more years and then internship and residency. It takes long time to be a MD. Luckily, she has scholarship. Honesty is the best policy. |
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Pharmacist, My parents taught me to respect and care about the elders. When you need help and called your daughter's fiance, he might be busy at that time. But if he cares, he would call you back or stop at your house once he's free. Or he might not get your messages? No, he has never called back. My computer had virus problems many times. I called her fiance and left messages. But he has never returned my calls. None. That's why I don't like him much. To me, he should at least call back as courteousness. He called me twice only because his mother had UTI (Urinary Tract Infection) and ask me for medication and once because his mother had severe diarrhea. He called and then his mother took over. I have NEVER met his father or mother. Honesty is the best policy.
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pinkcrystal: We can't change our past. I had high expectation on my ex but he failed my hope, so the only way out is divorce. I am a giver and always be the same. I gave him Green card, U.S. citizen, house, car, dental office, ... He didn't share the money he made, but the "Community Property Law" is 50/50, so he has hidden his money to himself and I have no proof how much he hid. The last words he said to me before moved out my house "There is no law says how much a dentist should make." In his mind he made less money and I made more than him, so I have to pay everything and do all the housework. The money he made is belong to him, the money I made have to pay for everything. The only good thing is I have a daughter from him. However, my son is as lazy as his father. My son has graduated from high school in 2007 but only occasionally attended some college classes. My son wasted near 8 years time living with me for free, doing nothing but playing computer games. They are two completely opposite personalities. Daughter got my ambitious, generous, giver, smart,... personalities, but Son got his father personality, slacker, lazy, taker, no confidence,... using twist excuses to avoid to pay or do things. Their blood have different genes. My banker CEO knows all those story. Honesty is the best policy.
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To be honest to answer your question, I am NOT 100% like him (the future Son-In-Law) for many reasons: 1. My daughter is in love, but love is "Blind". Young couple attract to each other base on "physical" just like we had once when young. 2. I want the BEST for my daughter (no doubt). Mothers are always very protective for her children. No matter who marry my daughter, he won't be good enough for my criteria. 3. He loves my daughter, i know, but he is NOT nice to me. When my computer had problem, my daughter is far away, so I called him to take a look of my computer, but he has NEVER returned my calls even I left messages in his "voice mail". I am computer illiterate and need computer everyday. 4. I have grievance from my past marriage. My ex sponged on me. I am a 100% Giver, he is a 100% Taker. When the Giver felt unfair, the problems started. As you know, my daughter's fiance is "physician assistant", my daughter will be a MD. Another case of "Woman is stronger than Man". 5. My ex proposed me to marry him in 2 & 1/2 months because he needed me to get his "Green card", "Financial" (he had $34.85 in checking), Failed 6 years California Dentist License Exam. I saved him from Hell. But when he got his "Green card", he didn't SHARE MONEY with me. He has hidden MONEY to himself. He is a slacker, slowpoke, a beggar, .... I am retreat, disappointed, ... I am afraid of my daughter will have same fate like mine. 6. However, the differences are "my daughter and her fiance are both born in USA". They are US citizens, raised and educated in USA. They are "sweetheart" for 10 & 1/2 years. Her finance tried very hard to earn a job and he share MONEY with my daughter while she is still studying. As you know "Mother never satisfied". But I wish them the best to have a good marriage in the future. They have my blessing. My daughter donated her hair for cancer society and her blood for Red Cross again last weekend when she came home for engagement even only stayed 1 night/ 2 days. Honesty is the best policy.
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Best of Wishes to them.  Honesty is the best policy.
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Congratulations! My younger daughter also got her degree in Psychology and was engaged recently. They are getting married in October. My daughter still need to study for 2 more years in Detroit for her post-graduated medical school, then internship and residency. It is long way to go. I don't know when will they get marry. Her fiance paid the lunch for all 4 of us for the first time. I wanted to pay for the lunch but he insisted to pay. He showed me "he is NOT depended on women" as my ex did. I like his spirit. I used to pay meals when they were still students. My daughter seems very happy with the engagement ring. Just like when once we were young. I wish them well. Honesty is the best policy.
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Long time not talking on Chinese FriendFinder with you. How have you been? Her fiance is NOT a doctor, he works at a hospital ER as a technician. In Psychology, you need to have PhD to get a job. However, I admire his spirit. He worked at a hospital as volunteer (without pay) and finally hospital hired him with pay. He is a hard-worker for the most stressful job at ER doing worst shift (evening shit). I have worked at Kaiser hospital pharmacy, I know it is a very stressful job. He works on Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's Day too (3 big holidays in USA). My ex is a self-employed dentist but is a slacker works at the dental office that I paid for the construction and wrote he made $2 per month on divorce financial statement. It was a heartbroken truth. My daughter saw my failure marriage, so they will sign a "pre-nup" agreement when it is time for marriage. They know my daughter will make more money than her fiance. They know they need to be 50/50 relationship. At the present time, her fiance is working, but my daughter is still studying for 2 more years to become a MD. In my house we are "Women are stronger, Men are lazy" I and my daughter are ambitious, studying hard, working hard. My ex and my son are slackers. They didn't attend U.S. college or dental school. So, they are not confident and depended on me to pay everything literally. My marriage is a sad story. I gave my ex "Green card" S.S. #, money, property, cars, ... but he is greedy to ask for alimony and 50% of the properties I bought during the marriage. Honesty is the best policy.
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Best of Wishes to them.
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It is a diamond ring, much smaller than mine. Honesty is the best policy.
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No, they are NOT married yet. She will go back to Detroit, Michigan for medical school for 2 more years. He is working at a hospital emergency room in California. They are in separate states. No pregnant ! I am NOT grandma. Honesty is the best policy.
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I gave her something I bought from Australia and New Zealand, i.e. Tim Tam cookie, a T-shirt with Koala (can glow in the dark), ... but some of the things she doesn't want them. Honesty is the best policy.
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Thank you, kayra. Honesty is the best policy.
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