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Weekend joke - No lawyer in the Heaven? An engineer dies and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his file and says, "Ah, you're an engineer -- you're in the wrong place." So, the engineer reports to the gates of hell and is let in. Pretty soon, he gets dissatisfied with the level of comfort in hell, and starts designing and building improvements. After a while, they've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and the engineer is a pretty popular guy. One day, God calls Satan up on the telephone and says with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in hell?" Satan replies, "Hey, things are going great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next." God replies, "What??? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake -- he should never have gotten down there; send him up here." Satan says, "No way. I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him." God says, "Send him back up here or I'll sue." Satan laughs uproariously and answers, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?" p.s. As a reminder, I am NOT the original writer of all the "Weekend jokes", so I am NOT responsible for them. Those "weekend jokes" are from my Las Vegas real estate agent weekly. Honesty is the best policy. |
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Imagine - John Lennon Imagine there's no heaven It's easy if you try No hell below us Above us only sky Imagine all the people living for today Imagine there's no countries It isn't hard to do Nothing to kill or die for And no religion too Imagine all the people living life in peace, you You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope some day you'll join us And the world will be as one Imagine no possessions I wonder if you can No need for greed or hunger A brotherhood of man Imagine all the people sharing all the world, you You may say I'm a dreamer But I'm not the only one I hope some day you'll join us And the world will be as one This is one of my favorite song. No heaven, no hell. Peace on Earth. Honesty is the best policy.
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On March 11, 2011 Japan had a 8.9 magnitude earthquake and tsunami and nuclear reactor leaks that day, there were approximately 17,000 to 19,000 people died. If there are "Heaven" and "Hell", St. Peter could be very busy to let so many people enter to "Heaven" or "Hell". Why there are only two choices to go? You know people have different kinds, different levels. How can St. Peter choose who to heaven, who to hell? He would be overworked. As you know, we have near 3,000 died on that dreadful day, Sept 11, 2001 terrorist attack on our US soil hijacked four of our airplanes. So, St. Peter could be busy that day too. There are so many other disasters, how can St. Peter chose the people where to go?? I have never been a Saint, but I have never harm a person in my life. I am not religious, I will remain on earth after death. I have my "Will" written "to be cremated" in an urn on earth. I don't believe in soul either. Bible was written by human 2018 years ago when they don't believe the Earth is round, don't believe we can fly airplane to different countries, or any science we know at present time. Bible is a fiction novel that written very poorly. Basically, the Bible said you need to believe in God and you will go to heaven after death sit next to God. Do you know there were so many dead people already when can be your turn to sit with God? I am not greedy to go to heaven because there is not heaven or god. We had send many astronauts to the Moon, but nobody saw heaven. Why? Because there is no heaven. Every time I read those email said he is god-fear person. I stopped reading and deleted the email because I know that is scammer. He didn't read my profile that I am an agnostic/ atheist. I don't want to change anyone but don't want to be changed either. I know "Politics" and "Religion" are two very sensitive topics. The pastor's wife who cheated so many church members over 25 millions USD. So can she goes to heaven just because she believe in god??? it is BS. Honesty is the best policy.
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 !!!  ???Honesty is the best policy.
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Everyone wants to go to heaven. But you have to die first to go to heaven and nobody wants to die. Heaven will be too heavy for so many dead people. I am an agnostic/atheist. I don't believe in God, Satan, heaven or hell. Honesty is the best policy.
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