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Joke: Age-Activated Attention Deficit Disorder (AAADD) This is how it manifests: I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier. I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full. So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take out the garbage first... But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first. I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only one check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Pepsi I'd been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Pepsi aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. The Pepsi is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold. As I head toward the kitchen with the Pepsi, a vase of flowers on the counter catches my eye-- they need water. I put the Pepsi on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for all morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers. I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor. So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do. At the end of the day… the car isn't washed; The bills aren't paid; There is a warm can of Pepsi sitting on the counter; The flowers don't have enough water; There is still only 1 check in my check book; I can't find the remote, I can't find my glasses, and I don't remember what I did with the car keys. Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm really tired. I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.... Do your friends a favor. Forward this message to everyone you know because I don't remember who I've sent it to. Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet. Read it again - your day is coming! Honesty is the best policy. |
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I received this joke from my PhD physicist, a senior Caucasian who enjoys his retirement on Maui, Hawaii. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Make a list of "Things to do Today" and get those things done one by one at once. I use the Yahoo or Gmail or my cellphone calendar to remind me what day, time and address is my doctor / dentist appointment, what day and time to attend a seminar or meeting, what day to pay the bills, use the "repeat - weekly, monthly, (even Wednesday of 4th week to receive my SSA check, ....). I don't miss or delay in paying my credit card, utility bills monthly to avoid "late charges" because I set-up the calendar reminder. I have many properties, so I have to set-up the automatic payment so that the companies can get the amount precisely from my account. That way I can go travel and won't need to worry about paying payments on time. "Calendar reminder" is a great method to handle those mundane things of paying credit card, bills, mortgage payments, .... etc. Do you use "Calendar Reminder"? I am very good on that. I have used it since we have internet. Honesty is the best policy.
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