beyondfantasy3 113M
2003 posts
8/8/2010 6:57 am
How is Love.. made simple

if we look around at the elderly couples who have been together many years, and then we look at the teens who build a love from the very beginning of attractions, desire and appreciations.
these two groups tell us how simple it is.
but the ages between the age and the senior citizen age.

We can see vividly, the havoc that so many in-between make the simple act of love, become confounded in ever sort of ego, challenges, contempt, collusive acts, manipulative ploys and use and abuse, we see encroachments of every type.

We see people playing status games, and making everything more important than the simple acts of appreciating the companionship, we see people making money become their measure, and then measuring their mate by money, title and every kind of fiction imaginable.

But if we look around, among the working poor and less wealthy, we see people enjoying some of the simple things, without falling apart at the seams. and some of the wise wealthy, who understand that money is not their self measure, seem to also, make good relationship.

Just last week, a guy told me, that he would go fishing on Saturday, and he would buy a Pizza and get a movie for he and his wife to watch on Friday night, he called her, to see what type of pizza she wanted. he was simply delighted, about the simplicity of sharing time with his wife. he's been married for many years, he does the maintenance work, at the building, he has a in school who is pursuing becoming a anesthetist.

It's simple,in the ways they enjoy the simple things. He offers to stop in the morning and bring the sausage and biscuits from a place he frequents for breakfast, and many of the women in the office, place their orders the day before.
He always has a good interesting conversation to engage about. and seems so over-all contented with his relationship, and his personal value points.

Then we have the status pursuers, who seem to be somewhat anguished on a wide frequency. we have those who have complaints about everything in their relationships. Then we have those who speak about their past marriages, but they have somewhat anguish that they did not make it work better.
I think many, when they loose it, they realize the tyrant mentality they may have engaged to help destroy it. and then its without the ability to repair, because the mate has gone on and found another marriage, and made longevity out of it.

Its sad to see some of the women, who have become bitter behind their broken relationships, and shut down, and in their eyes and their words, they long for a relationship, but they also convey in their own ways, what they have learned of how to work together.

I don't know if its age and the fact they are not the young being chased types anymore, or if its just the natural wisdom has taken hold.

I hear some of the women, talking about other women, and how they either ran this man or that man away, or how they used and mis-used the kindness of this man or that man, until he left. and then they talk about how good his new relationship is with the woman he settled with.

It's a lot of sad stories, that seem to spin and many of them have the same theme. "wild expectations, crazy demands, and power games, ego elation, and one thinking they are more than what has resulted to become of them".

While people are young enough to still catch attention, they may well learn, that the looks will fade, and the delusion of being too good or that someone owes them something just to be a decent human being. will unfold its own reality. and that reality may well find them, "alone", and filled with every frame of bitterness, their expectations filled them with, and their demands left them holding, as well as their illusion of being too pretty or too this or that, has left them to realize, how much of a self absorbed delusion it really sums up to be.

During this location move, some of the women, brought their husbands to see their new office, some brought their husbands, and he helped them carry their personal things in and set up their office, and some of the men, simply offered their assistance to others during the course of this move. and each of the women equally so, seem to just be happy easy going people.

Most of these couples attend church together and they are actively involved in their church functions.

Surely they have their challenges, but they seem to find a way to overcome them, and stay together.. "learning more and more, how to make loving simple, and keep love as a simple sharing, of and within each others lives.

Some of the women make more money than their husbands, but they don't seem to have that rift of trips about it. they talk about what they do to help their , and what are the cost they share to get their in college, and what things they go to at the college, to participate in various milestones in their s lives.

People make love simple, by first and foremost, "ACCEPTING EACH OTHER, AND THEMSELVES, AS BEING WITHIN THE RELATIONSHIP".

It appears that without the status anguish and the basing everything on who has money and who does not. many don't buy into the 'degree based mating", as some of the men are married to women who don't have degree, and many of the women are married to men, who don't have degrees. some of the women, who have big responsibility positions, have husbands who do manual labor jobs, as well as many other non titled or status jobs, but they speak of each other with endearing regard. I think this natural appreciations, helps many of these individuals make better relationships, because they have it based on more core values of "person as an individual", than these cycles of status illusion.

Maybe this change in the economy, not just in this nation, but around the globe, may make people, learn better to love as simply people, and by pass the pursuit of measuring love by monetary and title, degree and other status depicted considerations.

If only people could figure it out, they may find, that mate selection based on title and money, is simply a bargain pursuit, that brings with it, measuring sticks, that ignore the individual whom they have chosen as being a person, instead, they see them, based on the title and the dollar value the person holds.

There are more young couples who end up breaking up, because one wants to push the other, to be something the individual does not want to be.

We see far too often in the 20's and 30's people pushing away their mate, because they want him to be an 'Achievement junkie, or a wealth chaser", and continually leave him, saying, "he has no ambition".. but they ignored the fact, that what he does have, far greater than such things, is the want to simply share love and relations, with her. but she kicks him to the curb, in lieu of chasing the status and the dollar pursuers.

Thus they claim, love is hard, and that love is hard to find. never knowing they are looking less for love, and more for status and material equations. and generally over-look, the simplicity of love.

How is Love.. made simple

If it is not by the simple act of appreciations and and engaging the desire to be and do so.



beyondfantasy3 113M
4740 posts
8/8/2010 8:39 am

The South is far in how people seem to make their relationships work. there seems to be an appreciation to some very simple things. Its a very interesting contrast to the California things, in some California location, but not all.

there seems to be an influx of people who have left the West Coast to move to the south, they get more land for their dollar value, and homes that suit their needs without the huge price tag, and many know they can fly to where ever they need to go, and return home to a less hustle and bustle.

We even see it among many of the wise entertainers, who go to Hollywood and work, but they make their homes in locations far away from the glitz and spin of the bigger cities, and they fly there when they need to work or do promotions.

many people take their resources, and move to localities where they can do more and create more things, and they do well, in their chosen pathway.

Life will always be life, and temptations will always circle, this become much, but can be found of ways not to destroy where a deeper understanding exist and, the foundations of love is bonded. and the process of living undergoes many things, to bring forth the out-growths of loves realism.