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Marriage and Age Couples are waiting longer than ever to get married — the average age of first marriage in the U.S. is 27 for women and 29 for men — and in some ways, waiting is a good thing. Older couples usually have more financial security, maturity, and communication skills, all factors that contribute to a lasting union. But! If you wait too long to get married, you may end up divorced. In fact, the odds of divorce for couples who marry after the age of 32 increase by 5 percent annually. That’s the result of a new study conducted by University of Utah sociologist Nicholas Wolfinger, who analyzed data from the National Survey of Family Growth from 2006 to 2010. “My data analysis shows that prior to age 32 or so, each additional year of age at marriage reduces the odds of divorce by 11 percent,” he writes in his study. “However, after that the odds of divorce increase by 5 percent per year.” In other words, don’t get married when you’re superyoung, but don’t wait too long either. That leaves couples with a short window of time — late 20s to early 30s — to either find a mate or tie the knot. Wolfinger is surprised by his own findings, in light of previous research that showed the divorce risk for 30-somethings had flatlined, not declined. He chalks it up to a theory called self-selection, telling Slate that people who wait a long time to wed might not be the marrying types. As he writes in his study, “Such people naturally have trouble with interpersonal relationships. Consequently they delay marriage, often because they can’t find anyone willing to marry them.” Ouch. However, this news doesn’t mean that single women in their late 30s or married women in their early 20s will become cat ladies or divorcées. “There are always exceptions to this rule,” Wolfinger tells Yahoo Parenting. How play into this marital tipping point is unclear. We know that fertility declines with age — it’s possible that the stress of trying to conceive in one’s 30s can negatively impact a marriage, but Wolfinger’s study didn’t examine this directly. He notes in his study, though, that born in a past relationship could create conflict in a new one. The professor does have some advice for singles. “Don’t get married too young and don’t get married too old,” he says. “And find someone with some basic education and religious.” Good looks and a sense of humor don’t hurt either. Elise Solé Senior Writer (End article) _______________________________________________________ College degree is not a must, nor does it guarantee anything specific. find someone who is not adverse to working, be it their own developed skill or a work environment which can provide them some stability, regardless of the nature of the work chosen. A sense of purpose and a concern for understanding and a spirit with a compassionate soul, can be a great benefit to anyone who choose to get married. Don't create a mass of ideals built up on things that can change, such as money, sex, and partying life styles, or you might doom yourself long before you start the relationship. Don't be a spend thrift or a shop-a-holic, or you may find yourself alone, with goods that do nothing but get old and outdated. It might be your better benefit to develop honest friendship in the early stage of meeting, it can grow deeper and stronger over time. If you have no sense of tolerance, you might need to work on developing one, as people grow and learn, they can have value impacts that it takes time to adjust to. Don't play the soul mate game, if there is such, let it develop naturally over time, not one that is created via 'appeasements', because over time appeasement can become disenchantment's. If you are chasing popularity or someone with popularity, you might loose out in the long term, because such things have a season to be and a season which is may cease to be of popularity. Please read the vows and maybe read them with your prospective mate long before you come to the marriage date, so each of you understand how the other interprets what the vows mean. |
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I think the media is bad for people who want to have a love relationship!!!! It's insidious the saturation in the media of entertainers who spend a fortune on these media hyped get together. as if their publicist set it up for a 2-4 year publicity stunt, only to be followed by a world wind conflicting break up which gets more media hype. I've come to skip over any article about celebrity relationships, its to me the most insidious thing, when the cycle of the hype for people who have all the means and all the resources, but they can't live beyond the hype and temptation takes most of them down like bowling pins. Too many relations have money issues, mostly those where people have money, either the woman has it or the man has it and the ego's and selfishness follows, because in a system where its all about "buying something", or material measure, they can't get past that to even think about 'honest loving".. it comes back to ... I don't need you because I can pay for what I want, or the other side of, I pay for everything, so you do as I say. .... It's like money madness dominates their spectrum. I know broke couples who live from pay day to pay day, and try and save what they can if they can, who find the simple things in life to do, and they actually work with each other and curb their consumptions.... I hear them often talk 'endearing of their mate" a friend called me yesterday, to tell me, that she and her husband celebrated their 13th wedding and went on a Cruise, she said, he works 12hr days, spend time doing thing for the church and kids, she works 8 hrs spend time shuttling the kids and doing programs for the church, so they don't have the quality time, but they respect and appreciate what each other does... She said something else very interesting. That she learned how to be and do things independently and not have a negative attitude toward her husband because he is not available, she said learning to appreciate how to be independent, but still love as a unit and pair has been a strengthening point in their relations for both of them. We often see more relationships break up, with people whining because the other is at times busy with something, as if they can't actualize their individual self and still feel close and connected in their heart to their mate. Why would a couple need to split because the woman or the man wants to pursue career things, love is in the heart, not a matter of whether one is tethered to the other 24/7 .. It is about two INDIVIDUALS, being individuals who have chosen to share in being a pair who can still be their individual self who is connected in heart and spirit. Why is that so hard for people to learn ????? Is it because the media tries to put images that if they are not tethered in every act and actions, that its incompatible? People have to learn to build THEIR OWN Relationships, and not based on the old TV scripts which have influenced society for more than 70 or so years. Long ago, men went out doing their work, and women did their work at the home and when the works were done they enjoyed the labors each had invested and when they have the time to revel in the delights they did, but they did not loose the concept of love when they were apart. People are too clingy, and too needy in the society of today, and the word "depression"is over used, and often based on whether one gets to follow some scripted illusion based on what some delusion implies that they should have, rather than appreciating all that they do have. People don't know the value of individual health, nor the value of having a sense of care about another, they need to have the clingy fixed illusion, to even believe in themselves and what their inner concept of loves feeling is.
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A new mindset about how to respect each other and the respect for gender and a vast array of many things will have to return to the conscience of society; but as did the Romans, Greek and every other culture and nation that fell did so, because it lost the sense of respect for such basic and simple things among people.
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