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The Too Pretty Woman Hello Again: I recently got some advice to post more light hearted fun stuff and wanted to point out I blog purely out of selfishness. My primary goal is to process my thoughts and feelings by writing everything out. The fact that I share my thoughts in a blog, I do as a courtesy to those like me, trying to figure out if dating online is a viable alternative to the way it has always been. As for being so “heavy”, as opposed to light and fun; well, I have to view everything as a filter. The way I look, the way I talk, what I say, all has to do with being totally honest so the woman that choses me is good for me in the long run. I believe you get from a relationship what you put into it so I simply choose to start with honesty with myself and those around me; something hard to maintain as I get older but valuable none the less. Today I think about the “too pretty” woman; those that post professional looking pictures with perfect, hair, eyes, smiles, etc. While looking at pictures of the many drop-dead beautiful woman on this site (most of whom live in China), I question why I never tried to have more than one relationship with a woman I would consider “too pretty”. I have always told myself "too pretty" girls make terrible lovers in the long run. But then again, I probably think that way because the one "too pretty" girl, love of my life, was my first heartbreak. Maybe I'm still bitter or regretful, intimidated, or just plain scared. I hope not, because then I would be no better than the kind of dishonest, baggage ridden, guy woman complain about in their profiles. Or the "too pretty" girls my own age, for that matter, who will never find a partner because they refuse to change, evolve, forgive, and let go to make room for someone new. For me, I would hope I evolve a little more every day. As I look at all the angelic faces on this site I wonder how pretty girls ever get beyond all the b******t most guys tell them in the hopes of "getting lucky". Maybe it is the objectification of woman I object to but I suppose I have to also consider all woman want to be objectified on some level; probably in the same way I might objectify a woman in the context of a committed loving relationship. Hmmm. Interesting. None the less, the whole "hookup" mentality never really appealed to me. Yet here I am, fantasizing what it would be like having a family with young looking beautiful woman in the context of a blog that will not be read by many. Safe I suppose. It sure beats my normal M.O. of being provocative to keep my distance. Although being provocative is more advantageous than writing this; or at least more fun. Maybe being "too pretty" explains allot. Maybe it explains why often the prettiest girls end up with the not so handsome men; leaving some "too pretty" older woman to be bitter and uncompromising toward a new relationship dooming it from the start. Maybe some "too pretty" young woman figured out plain looking average men are better partners in all ways; better providers in the long run. Jeez. now I'm talking myself into being plain instead of being the educated, good looking, and established man I've been working so hard to become in preparation for a life with a woman. Yes, it seems I have backed myself into an intellectual corner with this thinking. My solution will be to stop thinking in ten days or so when my effort to find a LTR on this site ends. Or maybe I will just leave it to fate. Maybe the woman of my dreams will read this after all and make the effort to know me. Maybe we do meet someday, marry, and have a wonderful life together. Maybe we both end up where we are meant to be by being honest with ourselves and each other and taking the initiative regardless of "what people might think" in our cultural contexts. Do I want something? Yes. To meet the woman I have prepared all my life to meet; to have the opportunity to realize common interests and make the effort; regardless of the distance between us. Fate is a funny thing, we’ll just have to see how our Karma plays out I guess. I know I am impatient but hopeful none the less. |
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there is no need to switch up to become a 'laugh a minute guy just to catch a woman", because the same things you try to discuss now, is the same reality that comes up in relationship, but at least you are prepared to deal with something beyond surface frivolity. If you note in this site, anything that is beyond one paragraph, people simply blow past it, unless its a joke, or some romanticized poetic summation. but if you talk to any of the women, they claim how well they communicate, but reality is, they only communicate if you say exactly what they want to hear. if you encounter one that actually will talk about life and the reality of all that exist within it, as it comes up, then you might have something you can work with. Scan the blogs, and they will show you much, and if subject goes beyond the surface, you will generally either see a shut down, or a quick negative assessment passed if you try to go into the layers of subject, because they don't deal with the underlying layers of things. if you just enjoy writing,then you may enjoy the site, but don't expect them to read too much if its not about 'happy shiny topic'"... I don't think this site is much into things beyond that. but it is a good place to compile writings, just for the sake of writing. ( but be sure to save what you want to external memory) because its subject to wipe you out at any time, and everything you've written. but either way, you will find out what works best for you as it relates to this site or any of the others, there are a wide variety of people, who may or may not talk.
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