Teaching Your to be Independent, My Story
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Posted:Oct 24, 2011 6:01 pm
Last Updated:Nov 10, 2011 9:10 am 11696 Views
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I saw the article of one Chinese FriendFinder post that a 5 year old brought in a bag of Meth and a pipe to show and tell. The teacher did stop him from presenting it and his mom was later arrested.
It's really sad that the didn't know that the Meth is a harmful drug that would eat away your insides and teeth. I met one former Meth addict recently at my Spiritually Awakening healing center. He had some prior crisis' while a and got hooked on drugs when he was younger. Now he's become a healer at the center. Can you believe that? He has turned his whole life around and has gotten married to a social worker.
I was taught in 5th grade the dangers of drugs since I was young in the late 60's and 70's. So I never smoked or did drugs like other around me. I was strong enough not to submit to peer pressure when my neighbor girls whom, I walked to school with smoked all the way.
I made a decision as a young person to stay conservative, and clean and not get into trouble, that many troubled youth do. I didn't even talk to boys either or go to parties. I didn't try beer or booze, until I was maybe 19. Most try alcohol or smoke at parties by high school or jr. high.
I think there's are a few youth programs for to really stay off the streets after school, if they don't skip school. aren't self motivated for different reasons, whether it's not getting emotional attention from their parents, teachers or other relatives. But , themselves should be taught at an early age to be independent. I was, that's for sure.
My mom made me cross the busy, street in order to get to meet her at a dental office she used to clean. She wouldn't pick me up. I remember always walking to school by myself all the time, even though it was just across the street. But the kindergarten was around the block and I walked it often, by myself since my mom went back to sleep.
My brother also very mean to me by tricked me, when I was about 3 years old and lead me down to Rainier Ave., a very busy street and left me there. I sort of remembered the incident, and probably was crying. So I believe a woman picked me up and took me to the neighborhood bakery to buy me a treat, so I would stop crying. She then left me at the neighborhood fire station for them to call my mother, since I wore an ID bracelet.
My mother didn't baby me, even though she was at home most of the time. I walked nine blocks even in bad rainy weather every day to Jr. High and took the bus to high school.
If skip class or school, it's really up to the teachers and parent to motivate them or not. But each individual has to take it on themselves from grade to excel. I did well,very well in school and got good grades. I took the toughest honors math classes, Calculus, all the science classes and Japanese language in high school. I didn't didn't have much after school activities in high school and had Girl Scouts in grade school and Jr. High.
My parents didn't have to encourage me to do my homework and I even enjoyed attending Japanese language school on Saturdays. I loved studying in school back then, but was a quiet person.
But I wasn't shy to perform my Japanese dance, on stage since I did it at a very young age at church and also at Bon Odori.
Bon Odori is line dancing for the Buddhist Memorial Festival to honor your dead relatives. It's like Day of the Dead in Mexico. But usually the dancing takes place in front of the Buddhist churches and temples around the world.
I motivated myself in school, believe it or not. My parents didn't do much motivating of me and never tutored me. I did have a Japanese teacher in Jr. High who tried to mentor me and tried to teach me knitting, which I didn't like doing.
But nowadays, I will need to think about my career a little better. I have to be more strategic since there are still a lot of people in the U.S, still out of work. For now, I will work at my side businesses, as a dating coach and antique dealer.
Dating Coach, SugiDancer
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Study the Stock Market and Invest for Retirement
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Posted:Oct 12, 2011 1:31 pm
Last Updated:Nov 27, 2011 1:55 am 10236 Views
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Hi All! How are you doing financially? Many people are out of work now in the U.S and World. Are you thinking of saving for your retirement or at least starting?
I used to be licensed in Securities- for Series 6 and 63, and insurance, here in the U.S. So I can't recommend any specific securities myself. But it's important to diversify your portfolio if you own stocks, bonds and have some cash in savings.
I was a part-time insurance agent for 5 year. I think it's important to try and study the economic reports what's going around the world.
I watch MSNBC daily before the New York Stock Exchange closes for the day. They have very good experts to tell you exactly what's going on and their recommendations.
Also find a local financial advisor to help you out for investing for your retirement. If you are a woman, you will outlive your spouse. So take that in account, so you have enough money later, after you retire. I see so many senior still working a Walmart, McDonald's or at our Waterfront Antique Mall, where I have my glass cases at. In fact most of the staffer at the antique mall are all seniors and have to subsidize their Social Securities benefits. Since SS doesn't pay much. Other seniors who sell real estate or have their own businesses are still working.
Please also take advantage when you are chatting Online to ask what is life over in their country, since they have eyes on the street. How's business with the small business owners, is what I like to know, since I'm also self-employed now as a Dating Coach and Antiques Dealer.
Dating Coach,
Sugi Dancer
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Offensive Behavior Online from Men
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Posted:Oct 8, 2011 4:26 pm
Last Updated:Jan 5, 2012 11:12 pm 12093 Views
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Why Do Men Like to Post Naked Pictures of Themselves?
Since I've joined a few dating websites and looked on Craig's List too, I've seen a lot of men who post naked pictures on themselves to show the whole world. I'm also been asked many times on Chat to go on Cam. But I don't trust men who ask that without knowing them. When I refuse to go on Cam, some men would say offensive things to me, feel empowered.
They are professionals too and have college degrees, as well. But they end up doing such stupid things.
It happened to me today, so I reported the guy who doesn't have a photo uploaded, and said some very offensive things on Chat. I said to him to “Go Jump Off a Bridge,” to be nice. I could of swore to him back, easily, but I decided not too.
So I need feedback from a few men to answer my question.
Thank you for reading my blogs.
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Dating Younger as a Cougar
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Posted:Oct 2, 2011 3:38 pm
Last Updated:Jan 27, 2012 11:42 am 12818 Views
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Thank you for reading my blogs! Please read more of them in the future and come chat in this Site's Chatroom on AsiaFriendFinder, with me sometime to discuss them. I know this site or my blogs are being cross posted on other sister websites. I like talk about being an official Cougar today. I like to date younger men, as well as men my age.
For myself, I've become a Cougar because the main reasons to feel younger when younger men are attracted to me. I'm 50, but I don't have and like young people's music, including . I have great flexibiltiy in my life now in who I want to date. Recently, I did have lunch with a 23 year old who insisted in meeting me.
I didn't want to start a serious relationship from that, but thought this is an opportunity to talk with a young person to get his story. I like talking to all ages, if there's a good story behind the mask.
If it's casual dating, I find no problem in dating younger men, as long they are mature enough, have goals, and intelligent enough to be able to have a deep conversations with. My Ex-husband acted immaturely at times and never changed when he became Middle aged. He was 4 years older than me. We had a long term relationship. So now, I just want to have fun and go out dancing and live awhile if I'm 21 again!
The guy also would have to be able to understand me culturally since I'm Asian American and liberal Democrat.
If they don't act their age when they are with an older woman (meaning 10 -20 years older). So in my opinion, a Cougar is someone who dates a guy who's over 10 years younger than herself. It can be a compliment since a woman is able to look 10 years younger by keeping up her appearance. Lately, I've spent more time, effort and money to look great emotionally, spiritually, and physically than when I was married.
If the woman or person is just 5 years older it's similiar in age range if you are over 28. But I rather get into a serious relationship with a Middle aged man who's been divorced or married before (His wife would of trained him at home how to act, hopefully).
Yesterday, I met a 37 year old guy who just moved to town 3 weeks ago. He was searching a new girlfriend, I think since he just moved here and became obviously interested in me very quickly. I felt he was desperate because of his current living condition, and doesn't have a job yet. He flirted with me big time, but I blocked him since I didn't have chemistry with him and he's in big transition and probably wanted my financial help.
The writing was on the wall and there were many red flags. He was very intelligent but down on his luck at the moment. Because I've experience with a similiar situation like this with my first boyfriend/ lover, I don't want to get deeply involved with this person. He needs a Social Worker. I've been a Rescurer before and I shouldn't repeat that mistake again.
I'm a lot wiser now being 50 and it will show when you talk to me. I will mentor the younger guys that I go out with. So far there has only been 3 younger guys that I went out with month.
I've only started actively dating this month after waiting awhile after my divorce last year to get over Rebound.
Rebound is totally different subject for another blog.
But you can refer to it on other relationship articles in magazines.
For all the Cougars out there, I'm glad you are going out and try something different. It's a total new experience for me since I was 19, and early 20's, I've dated all older men. Now, I'm switching to date younger, since I can attract them!
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Unhappy Couples Staying Together With
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Posted:Sep 4, 2011 4:21 pm
Last Updated:Feb 5, 2012 11:54 pm 9507 Views
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I'm responding to a Poll whether a Couple should stay together or not if they have , even though they have many problems that can't be resolved.
Since my divorce, I've been meeting other parents with young , teenagers at home. I have one friend who did get a divorce and she Has a special Needs . She's struggling and without the financial support from your Ex-husband, she probably would be on Welfare.
adds joy into people's lives, but they are a big commitment and Financial Burden. My Ex-husband thought so, so he refused to have . I stayed with him for years regardless and stuck it out, feeling miserable. I stuck in out even though we didn't have .
So the burden adds to the couple's stressors, if they don't make much income at times. However, poor people are happy with many running around, but struggle financially.
They are the working Poor, who have two jobs to support their . Sometimes the dad doesn't see the at all like in the case of my Ex-boyfriend's dad and my Ex-husband's dad. Both had big families, grew up low income and didn't see much of their dads who were working all the time.
People do stay together and maybe live separated for years because they have . I met one women at a house party, who's was just two. She was lucky to get out of the house and have her Ex babysit. I can't imagine trying to date again, while having a small to take care of at home. Unless you are rich enough to have a nanny or get free help from relatives you won't have much free time to go out. Unless you take your with you on the Date.
But it separation creates more problems when they go out and meet other Singles to Date. I have a couple of friends who have been separated for 7 years, but living in separate states. It's their choice because of the , not to get an Official Divorce and they are also insecure about making that decision. Where as, a lot of people rush into marriage without knowing the other person. There should be a waiting period of getting married like 2 years of getting to know the other person's annoying habits.
I don't want to get remarried again right away and deal with annoying habits of my new partner. I have new found freedom now as a Single person again. After 5 - 10 years if I find the right person, I might get remarried. But I'm too independent now.
I may have to be more dominate to speak out though. I didn't while I was married before, which was my problem in communicating and staying in harmony with my spouse. It's a Japanese custom or Japanese American cultural value, to stay in Harmony and not make too much waves or sweep things under the carpet.
I don't sweep things under the carpet while employed at work though. So I've had difficulties with White supervisors. That would be another Blog to talk about. What do you think?
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Dating Again
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Posted:Aug 28, 2011 2:02 pm
Last Updated:Jan 30, 2012 9:24 pm 12212 Views
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Thank you for reading my Blogs! I want your support to blog more and want feedback from my readers. If you want personal advice, please ask. If I'm interested, I'll write back.
I am in a few women's groups already, where we get together and talk about men and men in their lives. That's right, Men, when your wife is with her ladies friends, the No. 1 topic is not about cooking or sewing. It's going to be talking about their spouses, boyfriends or about dating. Men don't share too much information to other men.
But women do. I do too. I also try to share realtionship information with my potential dates too. I always ask about their previous relationships or they are willing to talk to me about it too, without me asking.
But other relationship experts always say not to talk about your former spouse or boyfriend on your first date. Because you are not focusing on finding on whether you are a match or not. For me, if a guy wants to talk about it, it's information that I've gotten before I decide to give him a second chance.
I'm talking about since I want to become a successful Dating Coach.
I would need to become more gusty to flirt be able to work the room at an event, go talk to people and flirt or be friendly to get . Unless I know them personally, it's really difficult for me to go and talk to strangers or people I don't know.
It's also intimidating to go up to a cliche of friends. So a lot of times I just sit there and wait for men to approach me. Men like to hunt because of their egos of going on the hunt.
I like to hunt too occasionally, but will need a green light signal from the guy, in order to approach them. There is a whole science to flirting across the crowded room and can be difficult if most people are already seated in their groups already and not mingling.
But if I become the Host of a party or event, then it's a different ballgame. It would be my job to talk and flirt with everyone to make sure they are having a good time.
I'm newly divorced, after 22 years of being in a marriage and relationships. So I need to develop the talent of flirting with men agian. Then as a Dating Coach, I can teach others and have workshops.
I normally not used to flirting even when I go to Singles events like last Friday. I was at this singles event at a bar and there was dancing. I noticed that a few couples on the dance floor were making out or at least getting closer by dirty dancing. I was there to dance and make some friends.
Also to see some acquaintances, both men and women. But I personally feel for myself, I would not be caught making out with a total stranger in public.
A younger guy who I didn't talk to before and I believe he was really drunk, did come to me and stroked my hair and face. He pulled back walking backwards into the dance floor. I liked the attention for just one minute only.
But he was so drunk, I bet he didn't know what he was doing or would remember it the next day. He was going around flirting with several women like that so I knew he wasn't necessarily interested in me. I also try to avoid drunk people.
I myself don't drink when I go out. My first boyfriend when I was 19, was an alcoholic. I had that experience already dealing with an alcoholic and I will never get into a serious relationship with an alcoholic again.
I really analyze men's profiles first since it's the only thing to go by beside their photo before I start talking to them. I look for if they drink on a regular basis or a non-drinker. I will accept social drinkers since a majority of my guy friends do drink, but in moderation.
I have read many many profiles of men after I myself just started with the Online Dating scene. Half of the men want to get remarried. They can't survive without a wife and be lonely. But I'm meeting more women who have become Old Maids, who never gotten married or women who have not dated after being divorced or widowed. Last Friday, I met other conservative women who don't usually go out to bars to socialize.
Anyways, if you like to comment on my blog, but be nice, so I can approve your comment to Post. Thank you again for coming and reading my blogs. I'm trying to inspire people to think for themselves and also take some risks in dating. But be safe out there.
SugiDancer
The Dating Coach
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Make a Good Impression on The First Date
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Posted:Aug 10, 2011 2:12 am
Last Updated:Dec 15, 2011 9:39 pm 11103 Views
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I've recently gone on two blind dates with men that I found Online from a different dating site. The first date didn't impress me at all. He had used a picture on his profile that was 20 years old. He was very cute when he was 34 years old, but as a 54 year old, with shorter graying hair, he looked aged of course.
But I was polite and didn't walk off or say, "You don't look like your photo, so our date of off!" I sat through the dinner and gave him a chance. It was a good thing I had something else planned that evening in the same complex. We also didn't have chemistry after a long conversation the night before online and then on the phone.
It's ok, I wasn't attracted to his personality at all. He was in good shape and had a nice smile, but that's just about all. I want more as in a good sense of humor and can talk to me in deep conversation.
Morale of the Story: Please post a recent photo and not when you were 20 years younger, if you are middle aged. They can be one of two years old but not more than 10 years old. Shower if you come from a dirty job and come in clean clothes. Dress nicely to make the first impression. First impressions really count if you want a second date.
My second date also aged from his photo too. So I told him directly, I wasn't attracted to him, and we can be friends. The main reason, I told him that I wanted to meet him was because he wrote comedy and also was in Hollywood for several years. So I wanted to get some stories from him what was it like to meet some TV celebrities. I was real upfront with him, but mentioned that I do have other lady friends that are single too.
More to come when I go on other dates with men. I hope to find some more interesting matches. I'm talking about going on real dates and not just chatting Online. For me, I rather go on real dates. Chatting Online is very superficial since you can't see the other person's body language. Good luck on your search for happiness, fun, pleasures and worthwhile experiences in dating in person. Ciao!
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Dating and Building Relationships
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Posted:Jul 31, 2011 3:39 pm
Last Updated:Jul 27, 2017 8:34 pm 10149 Views
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Dating can be fun and challenging if you aren't willing to think out of the box or take some risks to go out to bars, dancing or network a bit at business, fundraisers or political settings. I've networked so much for my past job in sales. I've met local politicians, VIPs, corporate business people and community organizers. It was great to meet all these people and get to know some of them on a personal level.
Building relationships for business and personal reasons are both important. Dating to find that special someone is equally important. So that's why we are here on this site.
I'm very opinionated and can speak my mind when I feel bold enough. It's important that we all try to speak our minds and communicate what we want in a relationship before things get too involved. I made a lot of mistakes in my marriage for not communicating well enough with my Ex-husband. But it was a learning experience being married.
I'm recently divorced after a 17 year relationship and marriage to my ex-husband. I'm Japanese American. He was Chinese -American and grew up with traditional Chinese values from his parents who came from Mainland China.
I know all you guys who grew up traditionally Chinese or Asian can relate to that!
In some ways, it was good that he was thifty, so he knew how to save money. Other ways, it wasn't so fun since he was stubborn and didn't want to spend money to go on vacation or go back to school when he needed to get retrained, in order to compete for better jobs and with younger graduates.
At first, I thought I was a good match for him. In a lot of ways we were. He was more talkative to strangers on the Street, whereas I wasn't. (I'm changing now since I need to learn how to flirt or talk with strangers that I might meet at the bookstore or grocery store.) It's hard for me to flirt with strangers, off the street, especially if they aren't friendly. Flirting is a special skill in itself. I've read books on flirting. It's useful in sales.
I was good in navigating while driving in other states when we traveled since I do like to research maps and where all the tourist attractions are. He was terrible in nagivating and this was before GPS hit the market.
I really wanted him to stand on his two feet in building his own career and make wise decisions on the job. I've learned a lot from being married before, so I can take my experiences to the next serious relationship. It's been good therapy in talking about my experiences here and we can share our opinion on relationships between men and women.
Now, I can move forward in this journey of life and try to find my next mate.
Men have a "Nothing Box," what I've heard from another relationship expert. A nothing box is so they can think of nothing and relax really well, while watching T.V., and go fishing for hours while waiting for the fish to hook, without getting bored or watch golf on TV (Super boring for me!).
Women's brains are wired differently where we can multi-task and think about what to do next for our loved ones or other people. Often, some women don't take care of themselves first or aren't willing to say 'No,' to volunteer work or extra tasks.
We are programmed to nurture in order to birth and raise , take care of our spouses, our parents, sometimes neighbors and other people for our jobs. So that's why women make great nurses, doctors, life coaches, therapists, customer service reps/ mgrs., hotel or restaurant managers.
Please add on more of your opinions on this page. It's why I started it. I really like to hear from you from around the world. Each culture might be different in handling marriages, and relationships, compared to people in the U.S.
We can build a great community by sharing. So I'm training to become a Dating Coach too. I hope to inspire some people..
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Bon Odori, Japanese Festival
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Posted:Jul 7, 2018 7:46 pm
Last Updated:Apr 25, 2024 10:58 pm 6038 Views
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You can find Bon Odori, a Japanese Buddhist Dance Festival around the World. You just need a Japanese Buddhist Temple (Jodo Shinshu) that might be hosting. In Seattle, we have 4 Bon Odori events.
The largest is at the Betsuin Buddhist Church on Main St. Thousands of dancer and attendees come to eat some Summer Food and listen to a Live band in the Beer Garden in back of the church. I've been dancing Bon Odori since I was little.
It's a lot of fun. Other years, we have had the Seafair Queens and Princesses from different communities come visit and dance along with us.
Also there are Taiko Drum Performances. People wear summer Kimonos or Yukata or regular Kimonos. If you don't have this festival in your town, then check out You Tube for videos. Favorite Dances in Seattle are Tanko Bushi, the Coalminer's Dance, Soran Bushi, the Fisherman's Dance, Goshu Ondo, a very simple dance to do.
Favorite Food there are Kori, or shaved ice, Somen Cold noodles, Grilled Teriyaki Chicken, Grilled Onigiri or Rice Balls.
In the Gym are displays of the history of the Church, WWII Internment of Japanese - Americans, Crafts, Go Demo, and a rummage sale of Japanese goods.
So go out and have fun this Summer at your local Festivals!
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Vegas Visit After the Shootings
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Posted:Oct 18, 2017 6:37 pm
Last Updated:Apr 25, 2024 10:58 pm 5839 Views
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I flew to Vegas for a vacation two weeks after the Country Music Concert Shooting where 58 people had died. There were lots of crowds of tourists and it was business as usually. The hotels did display banners on their buildings of "Vegas Strong."
I also visited the Memorial of the shooting victims as well. I came across it by chance since I got off the wrong bus stop going to downtown. So I looked at the photos of who had died. It was a nice display of photos and people had placed flowers and candles there too.
I managed to have fun after playing the video Racing Game at MGM's Casino. Other Casinos didn't seem to have this game. It took me a few minutes to figure out the game and odds since I normally don't bet on horses. I spotted their old Racing Gaming using quarters the 2nd day in Vegas at MGMs.
From MGM, I rode the monorail to the Westgate Hotel Resort and Hotel to check it out. Westgate had Benihana's with a Chinese theme decor inside. They were not open when I went during the afternoon. They had hotel specials but also charged a resort fee. So I decided to get the cheapest room that I could find, at another hotel off the strip by MGM instead.
I went onto the end of line of monorail and had to transfer to the buses to get to Zak Bagan's Haunted Museum. It just opened. They have guided tours and actors in a few exhibits to tell you the haunted tales. I would highly recommend this tour if you like Ghost stories. Zak is a Ghost hunter and has been on the show, "Ghost Adventures." Please check out his website as well that has more info on his new Museum.
The basement is very haunted but they don't allow tour guides or the public to go see it. Once Satanic rituals were done down there, they said. He had a Possessed doll named Peggy upstairs next to the Dybbuk Box exhibit. This box is a Jewish Wine Cabinet that once spells were done with. It inspired the movie, "The Possession." People were told that if they didn't feel comfortable in going into any other rooms, they didn't have too.
I'm not too sensitive to ghost and spirits, so I went in each room. The exhibits and his collection were very old and very interesting. So go visit them.
Downtown is where you can find cheap meals. I had a side of Veggie Chow
Mein for $4 at the Fremont Casino's cafe or snack bar. Other Chinese dishes or combo plate was only $7. They also had a reasonable buffet there too.
You can spend a lot more on the Strip at the numerous hotel restaurants too. i didn't try any buffets since I can't eat that much anymore.
I saw a nice large aquarium at the Golden Nugget Pool area as well and ate my Take out Dinner leftovers there, while watching the fish swim. It was super relaxing. The most impressive casino that I saw was the Venetian in the canals, Food Courts, other restaurants and ceiling murals like Europe.
Also don't be afraid to go visit Vegas now. It's pretty safe now. I feel they could use the business. Overall, it was a nice visit to Las Vegas since I haven't been there for many years since they built the newer Casinos.
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